Respect the man as he is

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  9.  [This is where I started to find nicer things to say about monogamy.]
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  11. Looking around, I try to guess what relationships yield the greatest happiness and sexual fulfilment (and I know these are different things). I have to guess, because I have few confidantes in this area. One type of relationship seems to be: marriage between sexually unambitious people. These are mostly older people, of generations that regard today's sex obsessions as absurd.
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  13. Another successful type of relationship seems to be the one based on BDSM. This is between people who by definition are sexually ambitious and have the nerve to experiment. The self-revelations in the blogs on Informed Consent, http://www.informedconsent.co.uk/, demonstrate as much passion, fidelity, joy and pain, as any monogamous marriage.
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  15. I agree that a committed, enduring relationship offers an opportunity that promiscuity doesn't: the opportunity for the erotic connection to grow ever wider and deeper, year by year. And it needs to, because if sex isn't growing, it's withering. But how many monogamous relationships are growing in this way? My guess: the Taken in Hand relationships and, more widely, the BDSM relationships.
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  17. Theo
  18. chas_dar@yahoo.co.uk
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  20. by Theo on 2004 Nov 12 - 14:11 | reply to this comment
  21. Bonobo Booboo
  22. The fact that females seem to dominate bonobo society may explain both why the species never made it out of the tree and why the species is poised to move from a five-digit population for a four-digit population.
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