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by a Taken In Hand reader on 2005 Sep 2 - 18:37 | reply to this comment
He doesn't speed or endangers me; but I still have issues. Help?
I was hoping to learn ways to deal with the fact that, at times, I am easily frightened when my man is driving. It bothers him a bit when I gasp or grab hard on the door handle. And although usually we just try to take a deep breath and come over it, it has caused unpleasant moments.

If my issues were based soley on monetary factors, I wouldn't have such a problem. That's not what it is for me though. I have never felt my life threatened while he was driving either. And he doesn't speed (any more than everyone does). So at this point you're probably wondering, "What could possibly be bothering her?"

Well, it's the abruptness that bothers me. Abruptness in general has the power to upset me. If someone says goodbye too abruptly, without the proper pleasantry, I am sometimes bothered. If someone hurries me in a hasty way instead of showing "kind guidance" it can bother me.

In the world of driving, the abruptness comes in the form of stopping too quickly. I'm sure you all have experienced this before; and some of you probably do it yourselves. It's when you are approaching a place where you must stop, and instead of gradually slowing down, you keep driving at the same rate. The slow down comes suddenly, after you've almost reached the stop.

I, on the other hand, slow down gradually as I approach a stop. Of course there are exceptions. At times sudden stops are a MUST. But I'm speaking of when there is plenty of warning.

I do believe I've gotten better about this. Now I usually just take a small breath and try to relax and trust him. What he's doing isn't really dangerous. It's just that it bothers me. So... does anyone have advice on a predicament like THAT? Thanks. ^__^

~HollyCakes

by HollyCakes on 2006 Sep 1 - 11:15 | reply to this comment
Trusting a man to drive